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kanner59 added a comment to the news entry "HAAS NOTES/SUGGESTIONS/COMMENTS" on 02/21/2008. more
I agree, the less of us the better. Joe is just supposed to be the straight man, someone for haas to work off of. He's also the instigator in getting haas to steal the boat. He wasn't meant to be a dick though, just a guy that's been putting up with haas for quite awhile.
I like the idea for a "get to know you" moment with haas. I tried to incorporate those throughout the script but it makes it a bit lengthy that way.
One thing I was thinking of was losing the joe character all together and having it be just Haas. I really like the Hansen character though, but we could lessen his role.
When you say start from scratch do you mean ditching the boat stealing idea? I'm cool with that, I'm just not sure what you meant.
I think I'm going to go through and take elements I really like and stick them into a new script. That way you can see what I really like about what's there right now.
picketja added a comment to the news entry "HAAS NOTES/SUGGESTIONS/COMMENTS" on 02/21/2008. more
The biggest change I see, is to have more Haas and less of us. I don't really understand the dynamic between Haas and Joe (in the script, that is). Is Joe just a dick? Or is there something else to their relationship? I feel like I'd rather start with it being about Haas, and have these other peripheral characters enter his life, rather than him sharing so many scenes with him. I think when I take a crack at it, I'm going to take some of your ideas and start from scratch. I added a scene I'd like to see under the "scenes" tab. That scene could come after the Johnny/Richie opening.
kanner59 edited an action in "This is your first scene." on 02/20/2008. more
Shots of show and crowd. Sound board guy working. Quick cuts of local color: an aging man and women sitting on lawn chairs with their sleeves roled up. Man has on sunglasses and is smoking. Shot of an all american family. Group of retarded people (4-5) of varying ages/sexes are sitting on a blanket on the sand watching the show. They are wearing sweatpants, tucked in T-shirts, lots of red white and blues, glasses.
picketja joined the project! on 02/19/2008. more
kanner59 added a blog entry. on 02/19/2008. kanner59 made 39 other changes. more
 

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