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Quick pitch

Garrett has just lost his home and job. Steve, a telemarketer and Garrett's best friend, just lost his girlfriend. To fill the void, Steve allows Garret to live with him on account that he must find a new job to help with the rent. In the meantime, Garrett is asked to keep the house clean but his messy lifestyle doesn't allow it. Growing frustrated, Steve decides to hire a maid to motivate Garrett to live better and get a job. Cash scrapped, the friends can't afford a real maid so they devise a scheme in which to acquire free labor--adopting a child.

Project Type: Feature Film (Epic)

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Recent changes

JustusThomas joined the project! on 07/05/2011. more
Steviei joined the project! on 04/06/2011. more
KaaZobe joined the project! on 11/20/2009. more
csbell commented on an action. on 11/19/2009. more
You should eliminate "eat" and "by scientists" from the subtext. You could also add "new" to the beginning of it but that's up to you. It will make more sense as you will see:

" new scientific studies suggest that breakfast tastes good."

We already know scientific studies are conducted by scientists. Try to get rid of as much clutter as possible to make your story flow more smoothly. Producers will be looking for this. I would even go a step further to add another comedic dimension:

"New scientific studies suggest that breakfast tastes good, so shut the fuck up and eat your pancakes."
zjt228 inserted dialogue in "This is your first scene." on 11/19/2009. zjt228 made 265 other changes. more
garrett
Alright, that's enough, [drunken laughter] there's a full tank for you, boys.
 

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